Who You Are To Him 


1. Consecrated concubine
Without being immoral men want their woman who will fulfill all his sexual needs and pleasures. He wants you to turn him into Tarzan in the bedroom by being wild and creative – be a sex goddess.

. Confidante
He again wants his woman to be someone he can truly open up to, to talk to her about everything without fear of being judged or scorned. A woman who he trusts will keep things confidential without being reminded and he also needs a woman who is committed to him alone in mind, body and soul.

3. Companion
If you are a woman who talks less and listens more, then you`re his heaven on earth. He needs you to be understanding even though the situation at hand doesn`t make sense. He needs you to be his best friend.

4. Creative climate controller
A woman who makes it her sole mission to make his dreams come true and makes her man`s dreams hers without compromising herself or their marriage is who he longs for. He wants a positive thinking woman who will boost his self confidence and get him enthusiastic about life. Be his cheer leader and pay him compliments at any given time.

5. Conscience
He needs his woman to be his advisor but retaining the spirit of gently correcting him – be a kind conscience.

So ladies, these are the main characteristics that a man expects from his woman – if you`re short of even one of these he will still love you and he will probably not leave you but your marriage or relationship isn`t mistress proof.


The Age Factor


Abraham Lincoln once said: “In the end it`s not the years in your life that count, it`s the life in your years.” This saying then opens up the old debate of, is age just a number?

When it comes to human biology, legalities and socially age does matter but when it comes to love a lot of people have proven that age is really just a number. Society has over the years come up with terms like the “marriageable age” and rules like the “half your age plus 7 years” rule (particularly for men in choosing a partner) but even so you now come across relationships with all kinds of age disparities with both the man or woman being the older or the younger partner and these relationships have been met with a wide range of attitudes, from normalized acceptance to it being seen as taboo.

So, what really turns a person into a cougar (a woman significantly older than her partner), a trophy wife (a significantly young wife), a sugar mommy (wealthy older woman), a sugar daddy (wealthy older man) and a Ben 10 (a significantly younger male partner)? Some people say that it results from the deep desire for wealth, physical attractiveness and sex but some say it results from illicit actions of immorality but yet again, it`s sometimes as simple as that those people who are centuries apart genuinely love each other – what we know is that as individuals we all have different needs that need to be fulfilled by a certain person who we would choose to be in a relationship with.

It been a norm in society that a man is usually the older partner in a relationship, whether the age gap is normal or considered taboo but nowadays there`s an evolving trend, we`re seeing more and more of older women dating younger men – I personally wouldn`t be in favour of a cougar relationship, a woman`s maternal instincts always take centre stage in a lot of things including in an intimate relationship and instead of her becoming a lover she`ll quickly turn into a mother especially if she`s older she`ll care more and will eventually give more than she receives causing an unbalanced love equation. On the other hand every man`s basic instinct is to be a protector and a provider at whatever age but as he grows older he honours these duties more seriously which is highly appreciated by the women.

As a rule of nature as we grow older a lot deteriorates in the human body but the most vitality that is most hit by aging is the sex drive, the foundation and strong hold of every intimate relationship. And you wonder about how the couple improvises on the sex – but I guess just like wine, the more mature it is the sweeter it`ll become.
Here`s a look at some of the peculiar age difference between some well known couples:
• Celine Dion (1968) and Rene Angelil (1942) [26 years age gap and married for 19 years]
• Robert Mugabe (1924) and Grace Mugabe (1965) [41 years age gap and married for 28 years]
• Jay-Z (1969) and Beyonce (1981) [12 years age gap and married for 6 years]
• King Goodwill Zwelithini (1948) and 6th wife Queen Zola Mafu (1986) [38 years age gap and married in July 2014]

So I guess age is really just a number. Celine Dion says “…love doesn`t think twice…it never explains”.

Ex drama


Can you ever be civil with an ex without feeling obliged to do so as a result of something bonding the two of you together like a child/children, sharing business interests or having someone in common – the only thing you two having in common being the history you share? Some people say that they have their favourite ex, that one person who`d even be included in their last will and testament and some say that if they never saw the person ever again, the world would be a better place.

But when you sit down and make an introspection of that lost relationship there should be those memories and times with your ex that you`d love to cherish, those reasons that made you fall in love with him/her in the first place – hence the saying “hate the actions and not the person”. Sometimes being “civil” with your ex is really an understatement, at times you have to go down the long dreaded path of forgiveness and make peace with the fact that the person you thought you loved and they loved you back has actually left such a huge gash in your heart and being “civil” just doesn`t cut it.

It`s funny how people today have a long list of exes yet our parents and grandparents don`t own an ex lists they just have their wife or husband who was once an ex and is now their lifelong partner. What has changed over the years, have we become impatient or are our egos over fed or are we simply not willing to act civil because that would make see us as being submissive?

Maybe it all depends on the reasons why you broke up, but fact remains that when you parted ways hearts were broken and words were said – I bet that`s how Toni Braxton`s “I wish” and Beyonce`s “Best thing I never had” came about, the drama of an ex. But as much as revenge tastes so sweet and you`d like to see your ex squirm, the person is simply not worth it.

Anyone who can hurt you or heal you and in everything we do, we learn.